Looking at yourself in the mirror is probably one of the most difficult things we can do as human beings. To really look at ourselves and see ourselves looking back at us. What do we see when we look at ourselves?
I look into my own eyes from time to time even if I don’t want to. Sometimes I even go as far as talking to the one on the other side of the mirror. I haven’t done much of that lately, but it’s been part of my learning to love myself journey.
I just say, “I love you” and then maybe I give myself a little pep talk. Well, I did that this evening. I said, “I love you”, and it was the hardest thing to say to myself because a part of me felt the truth that I was neglecting myself. I haven’t been loving myself lately.
But, this time, I cried. Tears came to my eyes the more words I said to myself. I tried to lift myself up. I tried my hardest, but I cried. Maybe I needed this? I do know that my inner child is in there somewhere in a whole lot of pain from childhood. It’s just the way it is.
And once I realized that I started trying to heal myself which has been a few years now. It is not an easy journey. Sometimes I feel great with lots of self-esteem and other times I am at a rock bottom that seems to have no bottom. And other times I am just cruising through life flowing.
But today is a Monday. Mondays can be rough! All-day, I felt “just okay” but there was this feeling in my stomach saying, “no you’re not”. I kept going though. I did my job and I made it through.
Day 1 of 5 is complete! Acknowledging myself in the mirror is complete. Acknowledging the way I felt today was what I needed. I’ve been dying to write because it’s usually what helps me process my feelings. But I don’t think I can write too much more today as my energy is low. The wintertime always has me down, but I’m still trying. I can’t wait to spend more time in the sun so I can recharge!
That’s all I have for today! I love you all!